Just this last time.......

Because of my post on this same day....above, I decided to get my few rants out for now.

Dear:

Maintenance man:

I'm a friendly person, but just because I say hello to you every time I pass you up walking around my apartment complex doesn't mean I want to chat it up for 10 or 15 minutes about bullshit blowing in the breeze. Especially when I am bikini clad, or like this morning wearing a dress that for the most part I was naked under.  ( It was laundry day ).

Apple:

Okay...we get it, you. are. fucking. awesome. But stop trying to one up yourself every six months.  You are making us go broke.  Stop already with the upgrades and the fancy technology, and iPad...don't even get me started on that.  It's fucking irritating, and you know it.

PG&E:

Get my bill straight already, will you?! I fucking paid you a week ago, so why are you sending me a bill again...as though you forgot to send me the bill the first time.  Haven't you been doing this a while? Is there something going on in that big office of yours?  Shheeesh.

Uterus:

We aren't about to endure some sort of water drought for 17 days, so loading up and retaining 8 extra pounds of water into my body...is really useless and inconvenient to say the least.  You retained so much this last time...that it started showing in my fingers...and thanks to all that retention, the other night I had to go to the bathroom 8 times in the night.  Wow...that makes for some good sleep.


Target:

You know I love you Target...however...I don't love when you decide to get all cutesy with your new design for your stores.  I just figured you out, you were one of the most familiar things to me in this unfamiliar town...and now...and now..it's like I moved here all over again!! This sucks.

Cat Calls:

I hate you cat callers.  I am on a walk, not on the fucking runway.  I am going to the grocery store...in jeans...and a tank top. I know that is super hot, but refrain please.  You might think it's fucking hilarious, but it's not, and don't be surprised when I flip you off, cause that's what I do to assholes.  OKTHXBAI

MTV:

Oh hey...Real World...in NOLA...oh wait, they've done that...like 9 years ago. There are plenty of other places that could be shown..for instance..and I'm serious when I say this....Berkeley, Chico, Santa Cruz, OKC, Dallas, Kansas, Miami (or did they already do it there?), North Carolina...let's get original here people, let's start showing the next generation of viewers how to get crazy drunk, and promiscuous, and be disgusting in all parts of the US. Get it together.

People who use accents, in their typing:

For instance, Ya'll, G'day, Ma'am, you get it...it's weird. So, don't.

Flakes:

Hey, if we make plans. You better keep those plans.  I am talking like solid plans.  I have made time in my life to hang out...so should you, unless of course there is an emergency, or you are hurt.  I am not just saying it for me, I am saying it for other friends.  It sucks when I make a plan, and then you break it.  So before you go breaking those plans, remember, I hold grudges.  I'm just sayin'.