When I was in 6th grade, my parents got a divorce, and my mom moved back to the City, where she grew up in, where she felt she always belonged. She left my brother and myself in Paradise. But, truth be told I wanted nothing to do with her at that point...and I wasn't even thinking about moving to the city. That's where she met her now ex-husband...he was a tool bag. Anyway, right before 7th grade, my mom moved back, continued a long distance relationship with Paul, and my dad moved out. I remember telling my mom..."I wish you weren't back, I hate you for coming back." Not kind words, but when you are a kid, sometimes, you are either being honest, or just cruel. I think I was being a little of both.
Eventually, we sustained a nice relationship, I was a good teenager, always followed the rules, always home when I was supposed to be. But, that's because I made my own curfew...because she didn't. (She'd end up paying for it later with Bryan). And when I moved out, right at 18, she was mad at me for about 3 months. We weren't speaking, and we only lived 1 mile from each other. I was sad, but not scarred by it, and after 9/11 we started speaking again. Later, I would find out she was just sad that I left so quickly, and didn't say goodbye. We got closest during my engagement to my ex-husband, planning, and spending a lot of lost time together, I also worked for her during this time. But, even on my wedding, we had gotten into a fight and she told me she wouldn't be coming to my wedding. So be it..I had no control over her, she'd regret it later I thought. But she came, and she looked really pretty, and she even cried, something I never thought would happen.
She helped me buy my business in Chico, and gave me advice with that. She gave me advice on being married, and she overall, raised a good daughter. But I know, being my mom wasn't an easy job either. I'm not blind to that.
Through my divorce, she supported my choices, she let me have a place to stay, she gave me advice, and I love her for all of it. And when I made a huge move to Napa, she was really happy for me, finally leaving a small community, seeking opportunity, and venturing into the unknown. I love my mom, she has really always been my biggest cheerleader. And for that I'm grateful.
But these last couple of months, I really think she's lost her damn mind!! No..... I'm serious. And this last fight we had, I'm OVER IT!! My stubborn side has come out, and I'm not ready to back down. Seriously...mom...what happened to you? And when did you turn so grouchy. Yikes. I could go on to tell you what the fight was about, but honestly...I don't even know..so I say WHATEVER. So, until I've made up with her, I say keep the Hallmark moments coming, they keep me all warm and fuzzy inside.
You are your child's keeper
until she's mature enough to keep herself.
~ Laura Ramirez
