It's A Nail Biter Folks!

Can I just be honest for five seconds?! 10 years ago, I was like "Baseball?! Yawwwwnnnn", 8 Years ago..I was like "Baseball...AWESOME", 5 Years ago...I was finding anyway, anyhow....to get to AT&T Baseball Park to see a game, and now...I am like "Baseball...Giants...Shortcut on my desktop let me text my Dilla...".  It's pretty exciting stuff...and if I'm being honest....I've never been more glued to the T.V. than I have during this series. 

GO GIANTS!!!

Photo Courtesy of Nhat V. Myer

being single

 I restore myself when I'm alone.~ Marilyn Monroe

This is the longest I've ever been single, in my whole adult life. Wait....no actually, in my whole life. Even as a kid, and as a teenager, I had boyfriends.  Ask my parents, and I even had Aaron as a boyfriend in Kindergarten.   I love, LOVE.  I love the feeling of it, the excitement of new love, I love having a companion and someone to share my life with. To call in the middle of the day, to just say hello.   Although, I am not ready to settle down yet, I still miss the feeling of being a part of a real couple.

But, in some instances, you can be lonelier in the wrong relationship, than you can ever be when you are single.  I have been in that situation.  I have to admit, that being single is one of the most self-discovering times of my life.  And one of the things that I love about being single, is all of the possibilities that I get to explore.

I have too many friends right now, that are in the wrong relationships, and either don't want to get out of it for lack of companionship with another man, they think there is no one else out there for them, or because they don't want to hurt the other persons feelings, all the while forgetting about themselves in the process. 

But, I also have friends....Thank you Dilla and Johnnie..who gave up on love, stopped the search, and now have found a man of their dreams, who treats them right, who carries on conversations about life moving forward, together, and of a world that they both want to be a part of. 

This is my 100th post since starting this blog.  And since starting it I am still single, but loving it.  One of my goals...(sort of) when I started this blog was to find the man of my dreams within a year, and although it may or may not happen .....(I still have 5 months)  I'm enjoying my life being single.  I've got the freedom, that until now I never had.  I've dominated my own home, taking care of myself, and bills.  I feel happier than I've felt in my most recent years.

I am a single girl, and in the words of Imogene Lloyd Webber "A single girl is undoubtedly in possession of a good fortune, as she has the freedom to lead the life she wants".

boyfriend alert

Happy February!! Month of LOOOOVEEEEE!!!!

I love to flirt.  I do, I'm not ashamed to admit it!!  I have my whole life, it's harmless, and not messy, and in the end you usually can walk away with a smile on both of your faces.  I love flirting in person, ESPECIALLY with bartenders....seriously.  On the phone, online, in texts.  I keep it clean....mostly.  But the other day, I was texting, and this guy who I text on and off, says something that made my eyes get as big as silver dollars. He said...."You are the something or other in this relationship, and I am the other something or other."  EEEEK!!!

I let it slide, talked to Dilla, and she was like "Run, run as far away as you can." So, when he said it again, I called him out fast...."Relationship?!!  Don't go saying things that get me running for the hills now."  He quickly replied..."Oh, that isn't what I meant, I mean friendship relationship." He apologized, and quickly changed the subject.   PHEW!!!  I hope so, because this single girl is no where near wanting a boyfriend, or needing one for that matter.

I am really liking this single girl life, catching up with my friends, making new and GREAT friends, planning trips, and doing what I want for myself, for once in my life!! 

"Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free till they find someone just as wild to run with them." - Sex in the City

Fearless

Whew....what a week.  Got a lot done. Haven't had time to write, so it's all been boiling in my head, and now the pot is overflowing.  I got a text the other night from a friend "Dilla", that's my nickname for her. "Goodnight my fearless friend." I asked: "Why am I fearless?" and she wrote "Because you are awesome, strong, and adventurous." And just a week before that, another girlfriend told me she thought I was brave. No, not as in a hero, courageous brave, but just a fearless brave. I asked her why, and she said "You picked up your life in a town where your family and closest friends live, 6 months after a divorce, and moved down here to be with a guy that had 3 kids and a crazy ex wife, then when you guys broke up you moved out on your own,  and made a life for yourself, that's brave."  I've never thought of it that way before, but I guess there was a little bit of bravery in there. And it's nice to hear something like that.  I came here, made friends on my own, found people to confide in, found people to love, that would love me in return, and do, very much.  I've made my own story....mostly good, sometimes bad, but always a learning lesson.

Years ago, I came to the peace of mind knowing I'd probably live in Paradise my whole life, where my family lives, and where I grew up.  I never imagined I'd move to a town where I knew no one, and yet when I think of change, that is always how it ends up being, on my own.   But, true to myself, I take chances,and I know I have the faith in myself to always continue to be fearless.