The other day I was on my friend from Los Angeles' profile, and clicked on a friend of theirs...also a Los Angeles resident...what is it with these profiles? I mean...SERIOUSLY! Almost everyone of these profiles are public, fine whatever...you want everyone to know what you are up to...oh no wait...yo don't, you just want everyone to see your pictures. And of course they are mostly all flattering laughing happy...."candid" pictures, that just happen to be at your best angle...with some sort of witty caption. Sometimes, if we are lucky....there is a whole folder of HEADSHOTS...yea. HAPPY, SAD, "laughing", maybe a shirt off? Maybe a stomach shot....sloppy clothes, nice clothes...looking off into the distance, making eye contact with the effing camera!!! OY. Oh and usually for the whole "About me", it's some sort of clever one liner that usually went over real well in acting class ONCE!!!!! And usually...there is no year next to your bday....really? Ugh..whatever.
Farmville. Fuck you FARMVILLE. You are lame and are wasting my friends' brains. But, they get all offended when I won't feed their pig, or give them an extra nail for their barn, but instead for their casket which they will need cause they are slowly killing themselves on a fake, cartoon farm. Who invented FARMVILLE?! I mean...how old are they? Whoever they are...I can't believe it got the "go ahead" during the Presentation....again...whatever!!!
Tagging....you know how you went to that crazy party the other night, and pics were taken of you that you now regret but you are so thankful that your friend isn't friends with your boss? Cause otherwise your boss will see you taking Jager shots out of your best friends cleavage. Until your friend decides to tag your ass in all those pictures. WHAT. THE. HELL. If I wanted everyone to see those pictures...I'd live in Los Angeles and make my profile public for the world to see.
Disgusting posts about your baby shitting, your baby eating shit, your dogs anal sacks....and things like that. First of all...why is your baby eating shit? And why...are you posting about it, instead of washing your childs mouth out, and hands, and then hating yourself, for being such a terrible parent that is addicted to Facebook. And second, why do I care that your kid just did something that we all do...and for some reason we are all supposed to be like in awe cause your kid just pooped in a big kid toilet....that's sick, and the next logical step after that, is telling me when you shit...I mean isn't it?!! OH, and I don't care that you had to drain your dogs ass. When you post something, think of this first. "Is this something I would actually have told someone in my life if FB didn't exist?" Jeez!!!!! so sick.
Checking In this has become the most annoying thing that this website has started!!! Why don't you just move to LA and make your profile public, and hey while you are at it...tell everyone how much money you have in the bank, and in your pocket/purse. Your setting yourself up for a nice mugging, car break in, or a violent home invasion!!! Think about it!! Pretend I have someone on Facebook that is friends with someone I dislike...and I do this (Kerry is at the movies watching xyz movie) you now know...I am at this theater, I just spent like 10 bucks, I am in a dark theater...I'm setting myself up for having a creepy stalker out by my car after the movie, or people know I'm not home!!!! It's lame...and if you're smart you don't use it.
Last but certainly not least....always chipper, my life is fucking awesome posts, but then also...the complete opposite. Facebook used to be more about US not just me. It used to be a way to share things. i.e., links, information, news, things like that. Then it became "Kerry IS", that's how the format used to be. So you'd write Kerry IS...HAPPY...SAD...ANNOYED...SLEEPY. Catch my drift? Now, it's like this...I swear to God...this is the kind of crap I see...P.S. Names were changed... "Penny had such a good morning...I love my life so much I could DIE" (8 hours ago) Looking at it again...I see that "Penny is fucking pissed, my life just turned to shit...FML..."(6 hours ago)...what could have possibly happened?! Oh no...So, the first instinct I want to do is ask...but then I see the latest update...which was posted "just seconds ago" is this "Penny is a happy girl...GIRLS NIGHT..."...screw you Penny, you had me worried for nothing!!!! Somethings are meant to stay private, believe it or not, we don't want to know every tiny thought that pops into your brain!!!!
Of course it all can't annoy me that much, or I'd tell Facebook that we are breaking up....but I just couldn't hold it in anymore!!! I love you Facebook, and all the
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